Free Bytes: Double Feature

I’ve been lousy at updating this site lately, so I’m going to make an effort to catch up. Here’s the past two installments of my Free Bytes column over at IGN from last week and the week before! Boom.

Free Bytes: I Am An Insane Rogue A.I.



“As a psychotic supercomputer that’s intent on world domination, your primary objective is to take over the planet one high-tech warehouse at a time. However, each warehouse is filled with pesky, squishy humans and sentry drones that seek to thwart your diabolical efforts. With only a limited amount of cycle power to take action with, you have to carefully herd (or brutally massacre) your human adversaries away from each building’s computer terminals long enough to hack into them and take over the mainframe.”

Read the full write-up here at IGN.

Free Bytes: Goblin War Machine



“Revenge is the sweetest when it involves rolling over your foes with a mechanical automaton of doom and crushing their civilization under the barbed wheels of sweet metallic Armageddon. The clash of cymbals, the boom of drums, and a malevolent orchestral groan sets the mood for wanton destruction quite nicely in Goblin War Machine – a game about building the biggest, gnarliest damn war machine imaginable and using it to turn the human countryside into ground hamburger.

Read the full write-up here at IGN.

Free Bytes: Octodad


I’m a big fan of wacky games, and Octodad is about as oddball as it gets. You play as an octopus masquerading as a human dad that’s trying to do some crazy research while not blowing his cover to his human wife and kids. Intentionally wonkly controls make humorous light of the fact the protagonist doesn’t have bones, and fumbling your way through the game’s challenges is pretty hilarious. This student-crafted indie game is short and sweet. Definitely give it a spin.

Check out my write-up of Octodad in my weekly Free Bytes column over at IGN here.

Indie Spotlight #5: Blasting Rude Bits


This month’s installment of my indie-gaming developer spotlight column over at GameSpy highlights the insanely charming and quirky Zombie Cow Studios. Much of the feature discusses some of the behind-the-scenes stuff from their recent game Privates – a bizarre educational game revolving around blasting STDs inside vaginas and anus (anuses…ani? What’s the proper plurar for an arse-hole?) while providing important info about the nasty stuff.

Check out the column here at GameSpy, and stay tuned for a new installment next month!

Top Downloadable Games October 2010


“The spooks and specters are out and about this month, which means the holiday gaming season is almost upon us. With lots of big blockbuster titles recently released and many others great games set to launch in the coming weeks, there’s a lot to be excited about. But don’t forget about the tasty downloadable goodies awaiting you as well! This month’s downloadable games selection has us hunting for candy in crazy costumes, hopping through scores of comics, rhythmically blasting robots in space, and head-banging with some baddies.”

Ok, I’ve neglected to post each installment here over the past few months, but my monthly downloadable games column is still going strong over at What They Play. Check out the October installment here.

Free Bytes: Haunt the House


“In Haunt the House, you play as a seemingly docile little ghost looking to prove yourself by freaking the hell out of a the 30 dinner guests visiting the mansion you happen to be haunting. Since the only thing about the mansion that’s spooky from the get-go is the price tag for the expensive furniture, you have to really shake things up to set the right blood-curdling atmosphere. Flying around from room to room, you can possess any objects you encounter and then make them do creepy thing to freak out the guests.”

Check out the full column here at IGN.

Free Bytes: Road of the Dead


“Guns, axes, chainsaws, and explosives might be among the most preferred methods of killing zombies, but running them down with a pimped-out hotrod and splattering their innards across your windshield is pretty satisfying too. When the military tries to lock down the entire city just as the dead begin rising and feasting on the living, you decide to hop into your slick car and hightail it out of town. Staying alive long enough to make it out of the doomed city in Road of the Dead requires putting the pedal to the medal and pulling off some fancy high speed driving, but it’s more about strategy than flat-out racing.”

Check out the full column here at IGN.

Indie Spotlight #4: Bit.Trip Awesome


“When I first met the guys from indie studio Gaijin Games not too long ago, we bumped into each other in a packed warehouse in Brooklyn that was hosting Blip Festival 2009 — an annual celebration of wild new music being made by artists using homebrew software running on old-school gaming devices like the Game Boy, NES, and Commodore 64. The evening was filled with high energy 8-bit audio revelry cranked out at maximum volume by chip musicians like Nullsleep, Bit Shifter, Bubblyfish, and many others. Gaijin’s presence was no coincidence; these guys dig quirky retro-tinged music, and it’s one of the core driving forces behind the games they create.”

Check out the full column here at GameSpy.

Free Bytes: Sheriff Sam


“In the dusty plains and sweltering heat of the Wild West, a man does not readily part ways with his trusty steed, particularly when four-legged transportation can make all the difference between life and death. Keeping one’s ride in good working order is important, but when a horse hurts a leg, getting it up and running again isn’t as easy as changing a spare tire. When his horse Argo gets hurt in the middle of the desert, Sheriff Sam has to man up and defend his pal with a six-shooter in hand until help arrives. Unfortunately for them, it seems every critter in the galaxy and beyond has suddenly developed a taste for horse meat.”

Check out the full column here at IGN.

Indie Spotlight #3: Adorable Rainbow Vomit


“Toronto hasn’t always been the indie game development Mecca that it’s grown into today. Just under a decade ago, studios in the city were scarce, and many budding developers had to leave Toronto to find solid work. Sick of competing for the meager handful of game dev job openings in town and unwilling to relocate away from home, a group of enthusiastic game makers set out to change things. After a few years of working on a slate of mobile phone projects, indie studio Capybara Games has settled into a steady groove crafting offbeat games about rainbow-puking critters, puzzle jousting combatants, and pixilated touchy-feely warriors.”

Check out the full column here at GameSpy.

Free Bytes: PlasmaPig


“I never thought it would be possible to have so much fun pressing just a single button over and over again. The space bar is your best friend in PlasmaPig, but the hordes of angry battleships that swarm in to attack your delicate fleet of pigs most certainly are not. With only a weak force field protecting each of the mother ships in your dwindling armada of porky space explorers, you’re the last line of defense to prevent them from being turned into intergalactic bacon.”

Check out the full column here at IGN.